If you are feeling really low about being betrayed by a loved one, friend or colleague, put things in perspective by cooking some greens. After you've invested time and effort in picking, chopping, washing and cooking a large healthy bunch, it repays you by shrinking into a marble sized lump that wouldn't fill a Chihuahua.
The bunch of greens I had at home today showed every sign of their characteristic bad behaviour. So I pulled a fast one on them and baked them into muffins, where they were forced to rise, not shrink. Ha!
The second good thing that happened was a mistake! I forgot to add oil or butter. And it didn't make much of a difference to the taste of the muffins! Hurrah!
So here goes - my recipe for an almost fat-free, sugar-free muffin.
3 cloves of garlic, crushed
1 large onion, chopped
2 tsp oil
1 cup flour
1 cup quick-cooking oats
About half a cup of full-fat milk (I did say almost fat-free, and made no mention of cholesterol-free muffins)
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
Preheat oven to 180ºC.
Saute onions and crushed garlic in the oil till translucent. Add the greens. (I snipped mine carelessly with a pair of scissors, for the pain they have given me in the past.)
When the greens wilt, set the pan aside to cool.
Meanwhile, mix the flour, oats, baking powder and salt.
Stir in the eggs (ideally whisked), the sautéed greens and enough milk to make the batter easy to ladle out.
Divide into 12 muffin cups and bake for 20-25 minutes, till the tops look brown and the insides are cooked. I didn't try the toothpick trick, because usually by the time I get a toothpick into a muffin, I end up with a collapsed batch or a burn on my arm or both.
I have bought these muffin cases that are large enough to transport hippos, so I didn't get the muffin top so loved by gluttons and detested by models.
Note to self: Learn to use photoshop or learn to live with pictures that look like you forgot to let the dog out on time.